Edan - Sing it, shitface

Donavexx, lyrical asshole
Taking shitty MC tongues to the frozen flagpole
I fart at family functions, landing punches
In the face of life I paid a grand and three hundred
For my beat machine, my body, I keep it clean
By eating vegetables, while you claim indestructible
I made 'em feel uncomfortable by talking about my hemorrhoids
And now my parakeet's unemployed
I enjoyed watching old men
Put Pennzoil inside their engines, while eating cookies kept in tin foil
I been spoiled, like an underwear that's been soiled
By my opponents when I assemble microphone kits
Most kids are mere domeless
I wonder what their folks did
To make 'em think they flow swift with broken focus
Folk hymns are sung, while my guitar is strung
And then plucked, to make the hip hop purists tense up
Sure it's ten bucks to come and see me at a show
But when I stage dive into Jell-O, you won't care about the dough
But if you still think my shit is wack, you'll get you're money back
And then you leave the show, running into two men in funny hats
They'll beat the fuck out of you
And take your wallet out of your back pocket
After that, you'll swell up in the eye sockets
Then I'll finish my show and go to
The parking lot to meet the two men, who then put your loot in my pocket
I try jocking myself but that didn't work
After I realized that God was watching with a hidden smirk
I shit a turd that stunk the house for three weekends
Instead of R&B bitches, I do my hooks with Japanese kids

So Sing it Shitface

Ooh, I love farting in the bathtub, at clubs
At home, on the road, in your face unload
In your eyeball, fart while walking on the sidewalk
After nightfall, to the point you spray Lysol
Despite all the things that the people might say
I grab my genitals and tell 'em have a nice day
The right way, to grab a mic is constantly exhibited
By me, and the MC that knows he's unlimited
It's imminent, like water splashing on the coast lines
Where I go to town meetings
And on the bulletin board I post rhymes
Most times, don't give a fuck about what you telling me
I get excited and crash a third grade spelling bee
And just as a girl named Bethany is about to win my spelling "cheese"
I interrupt the train of thought by yelling "FREEZE!"
And when she sees that I'm nothing but a prankster
She tells the teacher
But I proceed to go and yank her for her title
Of third grade vocabularic champion
She starts to cry, I say, "That's what you get for tampering"
With the wordsmith, with the verb gift
The principal got nervous, when I ran into his office shirtless
What's the purpose of terrorizing elementary schools?
I don't know, but I penetrate your brain with entry tools
Narratives from the battle-tongue
My record collection consists of twenty-two copies of "Aqualung"
Half-a-lung is all I need to rock a venue
I then do, some Herculean shit on the wheels to cold end you
Got the versatility of ten dudes
Next stop my little shit-faced friend
Serves a chorus up from the menu

So Sing it scumbag! Yeah!


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